Shots and masks, vol. 43

Last Friday, I’d just walked inside the Woodford County Courthouse to

see who pleaded guilty and who was suing whom when a nice gentleman

said, “Hey, I didn’t see your story this week.”

This puzzled me for a moment, as my byline was on five stories for last

week’s Sun. Then I realized he was referring to this portion of page 2,

which, mostly for space-related reasons, did not include my weekly

effort to inform, irritate or amuse you. I resolved then and there to

write some sort of column for this week’s paper, even if it contains,

for some, more irritants than chuckles.

Here’s the dealio, folks: there are still too many people in the finest

county in our solar system who can get vaccinated, but refuse to, even

with the far more contagious Delta strain and others sweeping the

nation. Don’t take my word on it, though. While I’ve interviewed

doctors, I am not a physician, nor do I play one on television, though I

did portray a man with a life-threatening illness in a TV commercial

that played all too long in at least the Lexington market. I was

terrible, but sans makeup or much sleep the night before, I did look

ghastly.

Last week, Dr. Rochelle P. Walensky, the director of the Centers for

Disease Control and Prevention, said, “There is a clear message that’s

coming through: This is becoming a pandemic of the unvaccinated. We are

seeing outbreaks in parts of the country where we’re seeing low

vaccination coverage.”

She continued, “The good news is, if you’re fully vaccinated, you’re

protected … our biggest concern is we are going to continue see

preventable cases, hospitalizations, and sadly, deaths among the

unvaccinated.”

We don’t yet know what strain, or strains, hit the 41 people who tested

positive for the coronavirus after attending a June 27 service at King’s

Way Church. In last week’s Sun, Woodford Public Health Director Cassie

Prather said 29 of them were unvaccinated – including all four who were

hospitalized.

While I’m neither a doctor nor a modern day Sherlock Holmes, I deduce

from this admittedly small local sample three things: COVID-19’s on the

comeback trail, a lot of people remain unvaccinated, and those who are

unvaccinated are far more likely to wind up in the hospital or, ahem,

elsewhere if stricken.

Doctors say unvaccinated folks should, in many situations, wear a

protective mask – to protect themselves and others – but I’m beginning

to suspect that more needs to be done in the field of mask education.

For instance, our local, state and federal governments could invest in a

sequel to the “How to wash your hands” campaign with a “How to wear your

mask” campaign, which would, among other things, remind people that we

also breathe, and sneeze, through our noses.

Of course, another option – and I’ll finish my patent application as

soon as I finish this column – is a new line of masks for folks who

don’t stick their noses inside them emblazoned with the phrase, “Don’t

hug me! I’m a mouth-breather!”

I don’t mean to stick my vaccinated nose in the business of our Dear

Readers, but I’ve been here seven years now – a personal adult record

for staying in one place – and care about this community and its people.

I’d rather us all, and the people we work with and love, be around as

long as possible.

Please talk to your doctor if you’re eligible for the safe and tested

COVID vaccines and haven’t gotten one yet. I’ll bet a year’s

subscription to the finest newspaper in Woodford County that your doc

will advise you to get jabbed, and if not, to wear a mask to protect

yourself and those you encounter.

After that, if you still want to wear your mask low, gimme a buzz in the

next month or two. If the United States Patent Office comes through,

I’ll have something for you at a nominal fee.

Be safe out there, y’all.